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positive relationships

You Vill Get On Zee Board!

Photo by: jennifer_wilkinson via Flickr

One of my absolute favorite experiences on a cruise I went on last year was a surfing/boogie board simulator called the Flow Rider. On the Flow Rider the water is coming out at 35MPH which makes it easy to glide along on your boogie board. The person operating the ride was a big athletic guy with a thick accent. My wife and I called him the Arnold Schwarzenegger of the Flow Rider. He wasn’t as concerned about the time it took for people to get on the board as he was about people actually getting on the board.

Some of the younger kids, as you can imagine, just hopped up like it was nothing, but some people, like me, needed some guidance and coaching. Hearing “You Vill Get On Zee Board” was very reassuring. It was clear he meant what he said. There was little doubt he would do his part to make it happen.

His attitude is the essence of this technique:

Be aware of the value you bring to the relationship.

  • “Arnold” exuded confidence. He knew what he was doing, and as a result it was easy to have confidence in him.
  • He brought value in the form of being knowledgeable about the equipment, experience in being able to teach people how to have fun on the ride, and his physical presence which made you feel he could take care of you if something went wrong.

In any  relationship you are bringing something of value to the table. When you know this as fact, whomever you’re interacting with will be aware of your value and the relationship is more likely to be positive. Be like “Arnold.” Be confident in who you are and what you do,  and you’ll get people on the boogie board.

Your Responsibility in Relationships

Fear and negativity are fed by false and negative beliefs about the motives of other people. As a result of these limiting and fearful beliefs, many people use flawed definitions of relationships, such as “Relationships are hard work” and “Relationships are 50/50,” to justify isolation and loneliness. If we see other people as enemies who are trying to take advantage of us, then it will be very difficult to feel a true sense of connection and closeness. When we are able to truly take responsibility for our decisions and actions, we can form definitions of relationships that are rooted in love and enhancement.

Relationships can certainly be complicated. When people come together at any level, there are belief systems, preferences, and motives to be acknowledged. However, the process of building and maintaining a relationship  does not have to be painful. Although it can be scary, and sometimes frustrating, building positive healthy relationships is one of the key factors in a joyous life experience. The biggest challenge is deciding whether you have the willingness to take responsibility for your behavior.

  • How you live and perceive life is a choice.
  • A close relationship consists of each individual’s 100%commitment to its success.
  • Flexibility is essential in building strong relationships.

Relax with the awareness that you are seeking ways to improve your ability to live a joyful life. The condition of your relationships will allow happiness to be your focal point. Even when challenges arise you will be supported and loved. As your perspective improves, fear and negativity fall away. The limiting beliefs you have held onto no longer serve the purpose they once did. The responsibility you take for the conditions in your life will free you from the need to obsessive with your fear. As a result, your life will blossom.

You Are Responsible

The more you are able to recognize your patterns of fear and negativity, the more you can create positive and loving relationships in your life.

Fear and negativity are fed by false and negative beliefs about the motives of other people. As a result of these limiting and fearful beliefs, many people use flawed definitions of relationships, such as “Relationships are hard work” and “Relationships are 50/50,” to justify isolation and loneliness. If you see other people as enemies who are trying to take advantage of you, then it will be very difficult to feel a true sense of connection and closeness. When you are able to truly take responsibility for your decisions and actions, you can form definitions of relationships that are rooted in love and enhancement.

Grow Without Pain

Relationships can certainly be complicated. When people come together at any level, there are belief systems, preferences, and motives to be acknowledged. This process does not have to be painful. Although it can be scary, and sometimes frustrating, building positive healthy relationships is one of the key factors in a joyous life experience. The biggest challenge is deciding whether you have the willingness to take responsibility for your behavior.

• How you live and perceive life is a choice.

• A close relationship consists of each individual’s 100% commitment to its success.

• Flexibility is essential in building strong relationships.

• The only actions you can truly control are your own.

• Building relationships can be complicated. In order to build strong relationships you must take responsibility for your own actions.