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Are Personal Goals Important To You? Know What You Want Before You Start

Nov 10th, 2010
by Clint Stonebraker.
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There are thousands of resources available today for anyone seeking ways to learn how to set personal goals. Many of the philosophies are very helpful and extremely positive. Where people often run into trouble is when they hope the technique eliminates the need for personal responsibility and action.

Is It You Or The Program?

I had a recent conversation with a client that is unfortunately very common. She was explaining to me that a program her family was previously involved with didn’t work because her son didn’t successfully complete it. As the discussion continued, she informed me that she didn’t follow all the recommendations and her son didn’t participate in all required activities. This illustrates a pervasive mentality in today’s culture: The more responsibility an individual has, the less likely it is he will follow through with his obligations.

Simplify the Definitions of Goals

I am a firm believer in an individual’s responsibility for his own happiness. I also think the more simple one’s responsibilities are, the more likely he will reach his goals. Some basic tips to establish clear targets include:

  • Ask for the what, not the how: It is easy to focus on a particular object as a goal. However, the object simply represents a feeling. Make the emotion the focal point in order to maintain flexibility in how to achieve it.
  • Taking a different route will still get you there: There are usually several different routes to any destination. Choose the one that suits you. Your choices may not be the most commonly used path, but if it works for you it is the right one.
  • Reserve the right to change your mind: As you are pursuing a goal you may decide it is no longer something you strive for. It is okay to change your mind, after all it is your goal. This doesn’t mean you have failed.

Personal goals are important but they shouldn’t be sources of stress and anxiety. Relax and enjoy your pursuits. As you do, you will find plenty of motivation along the way. Happiness is both divinely inspired and the intrinsic right of everyone!

Ready For A Romantic Relationship You Deserve?

Apr 21st, 2010
by Clint Stonebraker.
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Ready for romantic relationship you deserve? It is critical to have open discussions to find a healthy definition of a working relationship.



Romantic relationships can be subjects that are terrifying to talk about. However, it is critical to have open and honest discussions about this subject in order to find a healthy definition of a relationship that works. People often repeat destructive romance patterns due to an unwillingness to examine the limiting beliefs and faulty scripts that dictate romantic attraction and desire.Unfortunately, negative patterns can create a false sense of security. With a strong commitment to improve, it is possible to change these patterns permanently.

Ideally,  partnerships are formed by the combination of physical attraction, emotional compatibility, and spiritual connection.

Romantic relationships involve a tremendous amount of personal responsibility. There is no other type of relationship that requires a higher degree of intimacy. When people enter a romantic relationship without an awareness of the responsibility involved, people get unnecessarily hurt.  If people commit themselves to improving their lives and their relationships, their attitude toward romance will change for the better.

“Soul-mates are people who bring out the best in you. They are not perfect but always perfect for you.”

~ Author Unknown

The key to any healthy romantic relationship is the willingness to take responsibility for all decisions, actions, and responses.

By answering a couple of simple questions, a degree of clarity can be achieved.

1. What qualities would the ideal relationship possess? (This can include physical, emotional and spiritual qualities)

2. How important is it to be a secure individual before entering a romantic relationship?

3. How does a healthy relationship enhance a person’s life?

Although emotions are at the center of a romantic relationship, they can cloud judgment.  It is critical to have a clear perspective on a healthy romance before being intimately involved with anyone. In the spirit of spring cleaning relationships, take inventory of how an intimate relationship is defined.

Once this definition is established one can remove the clutter of limiting beliefs and attract a perefect relationship defined by success and happiness. This is the kind of a romantic relationship everyone deserves.

Photo Credit:fujisan3 (Mr.mt) via Flickr