May 19th, 2009:

Relationships and Progress

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As your life continues to change, and as you get better, there will be people who fight to keep you the same. Human beings strive for security. We want  things to be as predictable as possible. This is why it is vital to our happiness to be diligent about who we spend time with.

“Progress always involves risk; you can’t steal second base and keep your foot on first base.”

~Frederick Wilcox

The condition of our relationships is a key to making progress. There are times when we need the advice, encouragement, and feedback from our most trusted connections in order to move forward. Making significant changes is scary and we need support. How do we determine whether our relationships are meeting our needs?

  • Start by answering this question: How do you define success and happiness? You must be able to answer this for yourself. Too many people sell themselves short trying to live up to the expectations of others.
  • Do you surround yourself with people who are afraid to be honest with you?
  • Are you receiving extreme feedback (hyper-critical or super sweet)?
  • Whether the feedback you receive is critical or supportive, does it boost your confidence? In my most positive relationships when I receive feedback that is appropriately critical, it may sting a little but it provides me with a direction in which to go. Knowing a direction gives me confidence.

Your relationships will always reflect how you are doing. As you grow and become a better person your relationships will change. This is good. Emrace and welcome it. You ,and those you love, will benefit.