No one can make you feel anything. Your personal power can only be given away by you. No one can take it from you. Every time you utter a statement that claims: he (she, they, or anything else) makes or made you feel a certain way, you have entered the world of self-deception. This is a pattern that can be stopped. In order to create a high level of happiness it is imperative to maintain personal power.
Change Your Mentality
Many are conditioned to play the victim role in relationships. As a result of this self-defeating mentality, people find themselves living out negative patterns over and over again. If you find yourself stuck in relationship patterns in which you feel your emotions are being controlled, there are a few things you can do to begin breaking the victim mentality.
- Make a list of the relationships which bring up negative thoughts or feelings.
- For each one, write a specific event that occurred within each relationship when you last felt stressed, angry or sad.
- As you look at each item, determine where you gave your power to the other person.
- Write down what you believe might have occurred if you stayed calm, confident and in your power. How might it shift the dynamic within therelationship?
- Develop a simple plan of action to begin your transformation towards a more positive non-victim role in each relationship on your list.
Your Power Is Yours
If a person has the power to “make” you feel a certain way, it is because you have given your power away. It can seem as if it is impossible to remove yourself from this dynamic. It isn’t. If you want this to change you must decide it is no longer acceptable to be in this emotionally submissive position. Don’t blame other people for your emotional state. Be responsible for the condition of your relationships and enjoy the positive change towards living authentically… no matter who you are with!