As your life continues to change, and as you get better, there will be people who fight to keep you the same. Human beings strive for security. We want things to be as predictable as possible. This is why it is vital to our happiness to be diligent about who we spend time with.
“Progress always involves risk; you can’t steal second base and keep your foot on first base.”
~Frederick Wilcox
The condition of our relationships is a key to making progress. There are times when we need the advice, encouragement, and feedback from our most trusted connections in order to move forward. Making significant changes is scary and we need support. How do we determine whether our relationships are meeting our needs?
- Start by answering this question: How do you define success and happiness? You must be able to answer this for yourself. Too many people sell themselves short trying to live up to the expectations of others.
- Do you surround yourself with people who are afraid to be honest with you?
- Are you receiving extreme feedback (hyper-critical or super sweet)?
- Whether the feedback you receive is critical or supportive, does it boost your confidence? In my most positive relationships when I receive feedback that is appropriately critical, it may sting a little but it provides me with a direction in which to go. Knowing a direction gives me confidence.
Your relationships will always reflect how you are doing. As you grow and become a better person your relationships will change. This is good. Emrace and welcome it. You ,and those you love, will benefit.
I was recently recommended a book, 
Connection is vital to a fulfilling and joyful life. We connect with people, spirit, and purpose. When we don’t feel a sense of connection, we feel adrift and without direction. It is so easy to get caught in the trap of trying to please others while neglecting our own sense of self. Re- establishing a sense of connection is not difficult. It may be uncomfortable, or sometimes painful, but not difficult. The two most important factors are to keep things simple and to be honest with yourself. Here are some exercises which can help simplify this process:
I started my company, Stonebraker’s Inc., in 1993. At the time, I had no idea how to run a business, much less sustain it for this long. Today I am able to recognize some of the steps I have taken and communicate them in a useful way. It is imperative to share any insights, ideas, and wisdom that may be beneficial to people if we hope to build a strong and supportive community. Over the next several weeks I will dedicate a post per week to share some of what I have learned, along with some of the mistakes I have made. I will continue to write on other topics but I feel it is important to focus some attention on this particular area.
Alas, the Arizona Cardinals lost the Super Bowl. After watching the Big Red for years it seemed Destiny would finally smile upon this dismal franchise through its powerful medium, Kurt Warner. Although in the end it wasn’t meant to be, they put up a valiant fight and certainly taught us a few things.
Yesterday was my daughter’s tenth birthday. It was a wonderful day and a true celebration of the wonderful relationships our family has. Ten years is a long time. Many things change and evolve. If you remember to pay attention, your gratitude grows exponentially.
Be the Change You Desire